I'm one for advocating the importance of self-care in the work that I do. I always recommend or advise clients that I see in my therapy room daily to focus more on their self-care.
When life gets busy and stressful, it's very easy to look outside of us for someone, something or anything that will make us feel better. Such as a partner, friend, therapist, a quick high such as a coffee or alcohol or to eat something that is unhealthy such as that cake. It's also very easy to pop a pill to make us feel good and feel better.
These are all temporary fixes and never truly fix the root cause of the problem or issue you are in.
What we really need to do is to fully accept ourselves as we are in all our unique strange and mysterious ways. Once you fully accept yourself, it's much easier to love and appreciate yourself and when you love and appreciate yourself, you naturally find ways to care for yourself in much healthier, nurturing ways that are longstanding. You begin to choose what's best for you. Especially when life is getting on top of you.
What is Self-care I hear you ask?
Well, self-care is where you are doing acts of taking care of yourself ideally on a daily basis.
The types of self-care can range from Physical, Emotional, Social, Mental, Spiritual, Personal, Your space, Financial and your Work/Career/Business.
Ideally we should be striving towards all of these areas in our lives, ideally daily to have optimum health, wellbeing and life fulfilment.
Self-care forms an essential part of a lifestyle that keeps us healthy, happy, and more in tune with our minds and bodies.
When we take good care of ourselves in all areas of our life, we're likely to see an improvement in many aspects of our lives, including our physical health and our relationships.
Self-care encourages you to maintain a healthy relationship with yourself. It's about being as kind to yourself as you would be to others.
It produces positive happy feelings and boosts your confidence and self-esteem.
Which we can all benefit more from right now. To feel good about ourselves and how we take care of ourselves. Allowing us to feel empowered and leading a healthy life and lifestyle.
Plus if you have children, it's a great way to teach this to your children; children watch what there parents do on a daily basis; so seeing mum or dad taking loving and kind care to themselves daily, can have many profound benefits for their future and seeing it as an essential part of life and looking after this human body that we live in. That allows us to have a healthy and fulfilling life all round.
Benefits of Self Care:
Enhances self-esteem - When you regularly carve out some time for yourself which is all about being good to yourself and meeting you own needs, you send a positive message to your subconscious. Treating yourself like you matter and that you have value and that you are important. Such as your energy, your time, your body and your health and how you feel about yourself. This can really help with self-esteem and feeling good about yourself. Helping to reduce negative self talk and your critical inner voice.
Helps sharpen our mental and physical health - helps us to become much clearer on our life path and where we want to be going with our life. And it improves our physical health and longevity of our body. Allowing us to live a more fulfilling and healthier life.
Increased self-knowledge - Practising self-care requires thinking about what you really love to do and what you really enjoy in life. It can help you to understand yourself better and improve your relationship with yourself and improve your life in many ways. It can also help you focus on a previously abandoned hobby or a change in career.
Better Stress-Management - Your able to deal with stress and stressful situations much better and more easily than you did before. You feel more in control of your emotions and reactions and are able to find ways to make thing better and easier for you long term. This helps with your residence to stress and stressful situations and your mental wellbeing.
Better productivity - When you start making time for things that matter more. Goals become more focused and helps you to concentrate on what you are doing in the moment. You become more organised and dedicated to your life and your wellbeing. Which is great for your health and mental health as well.
Better physical health and overall wellbeing - When you take care of yourself much more with self-care practises, you often have fewer colds, cases of flu. Less stress and a better immune system which can help to keep you healthy and well, through challenging times and make you feel more physically stronger and able to cope better.
You have more to give to others - Self-care gives you the resources you need to be compassionate and caring to others as well. When you give yourself self-care and the respect and value that you deserve and owe to yourself, you fill up your own cup, you can't fill someone else if you don't have enough of your own. This includes energy, love, care, compassion, motivation, empathy, understanding etc... if you don't have enough of these yourself. You only end up draining your own rescues even more and this can lead to burnout, exhaustion, irritability, frustration and anger issues later on.
If you have a regular self-care practice in place in your life you will have an abundant supply of energy, love, care, compassion, motivation, empathy, understanding to name but a few. It's about replenishing these when they inevitably run low, especially if we are looking after family, small children, jaggedly home life, work, business, relationships and health related issues.
That is why self-care is so important to our human selves to manage our everyday lives more effectively, without the need of burn out and exhaustion...
If you take time everyday to do something for yourself, such as any of these below ideally daily, weekly or even hourly - whatever feels best for you.
Types of Self-Care:
There are many different types of self-care practises that you can easily implement into your daily life and lifestyle. None of them are especially difficult or require a lot of planning and spending a lot of money.
Find some that you generally enjoy and that would fit your life and your values that you have.
Like last months blog post, I focused more on the physical, emotional and social aspects of our self-care needs. This month I am focusing on our mental, spiritual and personal self-care needs that we can easily implement into our lives, to make them more fulfilling and enriched.
Mental Self-Care:
The way that you think and the things that you fill your mind with greatly influences your mental well-being and general happiness and fulfilment in life.
Mental self-care involves doing things that help you to stay mentally healthy, keeping your mind sharp, Doing activities that you love that mentally stimulate you and that you enjoy and learn from in positive healthy ways, positive thoughts and practising self-compassion and acceptance, helps you to create a healthier inner dialogue.
Here are some easy activities that you can do anytime to help you with your mental self-care needs for a healthy mindset and life:
Do something that makes you happy
Start a gratitude journal - appreciate the little and big things in life that make you happy.
Start journaling in a note book your thoughts and feelings, spending sometime daily or weekly writing down how you are feeling can help you to feel so much better having expressed them.
Meditate for improving focus and stress relief
Do deep breathing exercises - this allows relaxation and oxygenates the brain and body, keeping your brain healthy and well.
Log off social media for a weekend
Read a book that you can learn something new that interests you.
Read a self-imporovement book
Listen to uplifting music
Watch a really interesting documentary that you are interested in or passionate about the subject and that makes you think
Get creative - make art, write, play music, sing, make something that you want to create, it can be anything!
Accept yourself for who you are and be the best version of you, set healthy expectations and trust yourself and the journey that you are on.
Make healthy food choices, have good nutrition, avoiding processed foods that can have a negative affect on your mental health and wellbeing. A healthy balanced diet can make you feel really good and happier in your everyday life.
Get the right nutrients - such as B6 and B12, Vitamin D3, Omega 3 fatty acids,
Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated. Our brains are made up of 80% water, so drinking plenty of fresh clean water daily can really help to keep your brain oxygenated and body healthy.
Surround yourself with positive people and people who make you feel good and lift you up.
Give back to others - small acts of kindness to others can make you feel happy and appreciated.
Talk about your feelings can help us to process our thoughts and feelings, so that we can move on from them.
Review your life regularly, sitting down every few months and writing down what you have been doing in your life. Such as what is working, and what isn't working, can be really beneficial and help to bring about changes that are needed for the future months ahead that can really help you to move forward and develop in life.
Get clear on your priorities, goals and values, what are important to you. Is key to dealing with indecisions and unsure of who we are and what we want.
Learn something new, it can be anything, even something that is out of your comfort zone. This will help you to grow and stretch your natural abilities and learn some new ones along the way.
Exercise as much as you can. Even a little can help with your mental health and wellbeing.
Become committed and dedicated to yourself and what is important to you and what matters.
Give yourself permission to relax and enjoy what it is that you are doing -relaxation is an investment in yourself rather than a waste of time. Take time out for yourself to meditate, daydream, switch off and give yourself a break to be able to relax and let go for a while. Giving yourself permission to relax is really powerful and can really help your mind to rest, relax and let go of the constant go, go, go... You will be way more useful to yourself and others when you do this more often for yourself.
Stop putting yourself down - We all have an inner voice that likes to be heard. But most of the time that inner voice is negative and cruel and keeping us down. Why is it that we put up with our inner voice telling us negative things about ourselves day in and day out. You wouldn't allow other people to say mean things to you? Then why do we allow it to keep going around and around in our inner dialogue. When you hear your inner critic or inner voice putting you down, change it to something more soothing, loving and supportive.
Worry less what other people think -It's very easy to fall into this trap of worrying about what others may be thinking of you, how you are being judged and treated. How would it feel to love a life under your own conditions of worth, without worrying about other peoples opinions and views about you. Do what makes you happy. Fully accept yourself for who you are and be the best version of you. You will feel so much happier because you won't be comparing yourself to others. You are not like others, you are unique! No two people will ever be the same.
If you would like ideas and inspiration on Mental self-care practices I am happy to chat or meet with you to discuss your needs in any of my Holistic Counselling Sessions or Holistic Coaching sessions to help you to achieve better clarity of mind and mental awareness to create a happier and healthier body and mind.
Contact me to find out how you can schedule a session with me to discuss your needs.
Spiritual Self-Care:
Many people associate spiritual self-care and practises and activities with religion. This is not always the case. Religion and Spirituality are not the same things.
Spirituality is putting emphasis on the well-being of the mind, body and spirit, which includes holistic activities such as Yoga or Meditation.
Spiritual self-care is just as important as all the other types of self-care that is needed to stay healthy and well, mentally, physically and emotionally.
Spiritual self-care is about taking care of your spiritual side of yourself such as being more connected to the present moment, being aware of what is and isn't important in life, connecting to others in meaningful ways, being connected and guided by a greater meaning and purpose in life. And allowing you to connect more deeply with your soul.
In order to live a happy and thriving life, all aspects of ourselves such as mental, physical, emotional and spiritual must be acknowledged in order for us to maintain overall well-being and health.
It is actions we take to deepen our connection with ourselves and our higher self, which is who we really are.
Spiritual self-care can be anything that is meaningful and kindles a sense of sacredness. It's a personal practice, such as a need for connection, purpose and happiness. It is a practise of any ritual that connects you to your true self, the real you. To your soul.
It's energising, inspiring and feels right within you.
Why is Spiritual Self-care Important?
Emotional and spiritual well-being have a deep influence on the mental and physical body. Taking time for your spiritual self-care is soul fulfilling and important for your mental and physical health. It encourages introspection, clarity and comfort to your life. It helps to quieten the mind, calms the emotions, experience more inner peace, deeper connections with others, diminishes feelings of isolation and loneliness and deepens relationship with yourself and others, as well as helping to feel more aligned with our core values.
Try some of these Spiritual Self-Care activities to help you to strengthen your spiritual connection with yourself and improving your overall health and well-being. Everyone can begin today!
Practice Yoga - Yoga is a Spiritual practice as well as physical, helping you to connect with your body, mind and spirit. It's a journey into the soul connection.
Meditate - Meditation is a spiritual practice (not a religious practice) that connects you to your higher self. It allows us to slow down and tune into our souls wants and needs on a deeper level. Helping us to strengthen our intuition and inner knowing. Helping us to live in more alignment with our soul self.
Mindful walking
Journalling - your thoughts, feelings and ideas about yourself and your life.
Read inspiring material
Contemplate over something that is worthwhile and important to you. Creating a life of meaning and understanding
Reflective activities that allow you to ponder and think about a deeper meaning that is fulfilling and helpful in life.
Practice the art of non-judgement. Not assigning labels or creating positives and negatives. Everything is seen for it's own inherent beauty. When you free yourself from judging, you create a spirituality that is freeing. You feel calm and peaceful.
The act of compassion regularly to yourself and others.
Practice gratitude - helps us to send out positive energy out into the universe that spreads out to ourselves and to others.
Spend time in nature and fully immerse yourself in your senses and being in solitude
Practice forgiveness
Honor yourself and your self worth, do things that make you feel good, cook yourself an indulgent meal that makes you feel good.
Practice the art of silence and connecting to the inner part of you.
Cleanse your space, environments in which you spend the most time in, such as your home or bedroom. Using cleansing sprays, sage sticks or bundles, palo santo sticks or using tibetan singing bowels or crystal bowels to help cleanse and clear your space of any residual energy is great for your spiritual self-care and general energy of your home. Regularly tidy away any clutter and keep your space in order. When you are in a cleansed and cleared space your energy and soul will feel much more at ease.
Nourish your soul with new knowledge and room to learn and expand. Reading spiritual books and new information allows your soul to expand and grow.
Reduce the amount of time that you use technology, such as your phone and the internet. Give yourself and your soul time to breathe and have some time out as much as you can.
Travel - Go away to some amazing places in the world to broarden your mind and your understanding of life in general. Travelling can be amazing for your spiritual self-care and growth of your soul. Visiting temples, spiritual countries, visiting cultural cities and places can help to transform the way that you see life.
Take a class on Spirituality - betterlisten is a great resource for spiritual self-care topics in mindfulness and meditation.
Go on a yearly retreat to fully immerse yourself in spiritual activities that allow you to become fully present and one with your body, mind and soul.
If you would like any help and advice on any spiritual self-care, as a holistic therapist and qualified Yoga and Meditation Teacher I could help you on your journey of Spiritual understanding and ways that you can incorporate more spirituality in your life. Just contact me to find out more or book any of my spiritual sessions or therapies.
Personal Self-Care
Personal Self-care is about discovering your true self. It's about letting go of the things that you were taught to believe as a child and finding your own path in life.
It's about discovering what you like to do and who you are when no one else is around.
It's about falling in love with who you are, all of your qualities and quirks which are all the reasons you're worth loving. Life is not existing for other people, it's about existing for yourself.
It's about taking a look at what you really want out of life and then to see what steps you can take to get there.
Finding what personally relaxes you and makes you happy is key and super important for your health and wellbeing.
Try some new things to discover what you really like and what really makes you happy. You will never know unless you try.
Form your own thoughts and opinions instead of letting yourself be easily swayed by the expectations and thoughts of others.
Try some of these to help you to work on your own personal self-care needs:
Positive Hobbies - Such as reading a good book, gardening and growing something, play an instrument such as a piano, learn to cook or learn some new cooking skills in the kitchen.
Develop positive habits that honour your true self and determine your health, happiness and success in life.
Knowing yourself - Knowing what you value and what is important to you? What your interests are? What's you innate preferences in life? What do you like and not like? When do you like doing activities - your biorhythms - are you a morning or night person? At what time of the day does your energy peak? What's your Life Mission and your Meaningful Goals that you have? Set clear and defined goals. What have been the most meaningful events of your life? What are your strengths and skills? Your character strengths and talents that you have? Acting on self-knowledge and self-awareness of who you are will give you energy and save you energy. You will feel freer and stronger because you no longer conform to societies values and how you "should" feel, act, think and be like.
Personal identity - It's our deep core beliefs and our values. Which is formed through awareness of yourself and to live an authentic life. Letting go of conditioned thoughts and discard ideas, beliefs and destructive emotions which no longer serve you. Acknowledge your limitations and work towards your passions and interests.
Honouring your true self. - By living a life congruent with your highest values. Knowing whats most important to us and expressing our wants and needs. Dismissing everything that interferes with your dream and embrace everything that encourages it. To let go of self-hatred, fear, unnecessary obligations, doubt, naysayers and the past. Instead honour yourself with kindness, encouragement, time and effort, support, belief and love.
Stop worrying what other people think of you - its none of your business what others think of you. There will always be people in our lives who will not understand or agree with us. It's not our job to prove anything to anyone.
Creating core values - can help to increase your confidence and make it easier to make decisions. Discovering your core values takes some time and self-reflection. Knowing your values plays an important role in shaping how you respond to situations and how to set goals.
Benefits of Creating and Knowing your Core Values:
Helps you figure out what you want out of your life and finding your life purpose.
Help you to behave in ways that match who you want to be
Helps you to make decisions
Helps you to choose the right career path
Increases your self confidence
Creates a sense of safety and stability, because you know what you want and what's important to you.
Life goals - Knowing your Values and what's important to you, helps you to know your goals for your life and where you want to be going. Having goals can help you with short or long term achievements and give you a frame work to achieve the milestones. Goals provide you with a path to actually do them. Helping you to improve your life and career and achieve certain tasks or projects that personally advances you in some way. Taking some time out to set clear, specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-based is key to achieving your goals and what you wish to achieve and advance in.
Time alone - Being alone can help to build your mental strength. Being able to be in solitude and to tolerate time alone can help in increased happiness, contentment, better life satisfaction and improved stress management. It can also boost productivity, engagement with others. People who enjoy more time alone experience less depression. It can also increase your creativity and confidence. Spending more time doing things by yourself can have mental, emotional and social benefits. But only if you choose to spend time alone. Being alone isn't about being lonely and loneliness. Its about the ability to appreciate time by ourselves to recharge and reflect. Its about us doing the things that bring us joy and make us happy. And helping us to discover new interests and ideas without having the worry about other peoples opinion of others. This really helps you to develop a sense of who you are, your sense of self and what your true interests are. Treat yourself as you would treat others. Make space in your life and put time into your schedule even if it's just 30 minutes reading in a cafe or at home on the sofa.
If you would like any help and guidance in finding ways to work on your personal self-care I'm happy to help and be of guidance if needed. I provide Personal Self Improvement Coaching sessions to help you to succeed by increasing self-awareness, building better relationships with other's, so that you can live a more fulfilling and harmonious life.
To move you into the driver's seat of your life, to create the life that you desire, examining and shifting any limiting beliefs, reaching goals with Transformation Coaching and personal self-motivation.
To live a more healthier, fulfilling and meaningful life and develop habits of happiness.
Find your passions, purpose and priorities. Live life on your terms and get the most out of it.
Create your own body, how you spend your time and what you do with your life. Cultivate discipline, focus and personal accountability to achieve your life goals.
Build confidence, motivation, empowerment and positivity in your life.
Become 100% secure in who you are and what you do.
Build natural, long-lasting confidence, overcome low self-esteem.
Tap into your best self - claim your inner power - cultivate strong self-belief.
If this is something that you would like to achieve and have in your life? Allow me to help you, just email or call me to schedule a free 10minute call to discuss your situation and where you would like to go. I look forward to helping you on your journey and self-care.
I hope that you enjoyed this post? I would love to hear from you and your own self-care practices that you do either daily, weekly or monthly.
Until next time...
Keep well and stay safe.
Best Wishes
Kelly
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From Pure Bliss Holistic Therapies in Henley-on-Thames
Email: pureblissretreats@mail.com